Sunday, June 28, 2015

The Breakup

This weekend I broke up with someone... well some place actually. Dallas and I have had this thing for almost as long as I can remember. My parents would send me to the BigD for little weekends when I was about 10 and every summer or break after that I would spend with my aunt and uncle and very little, at the time, cousin.

Even at 10 we did Dallas up right. Shopping, symphonies, theater, restaurants. NorthPark declined my debit card several times in my high school years because I had no idea about money and no credit card (thank GOD) but man I knew good shopping. When we moved there 7 years ago I was so excited. I gained 5 pounds in about 3 weeks and almost went broke when we discovered Central Market. When we joined Northwest Bible and bought our house on Princess Lane the addition of friends and children and a community of incredible women was more than my heart could take, I was in heaven.

So when God called us home to B/CS I was confused. And this past year I've carried on a long distance love affair with Dallas. I didn't want to really be here, I wanted to be THERE. I didn't want to make friends, my friends were THERE. I don't want to get involved in my church, my church is THERE. And I don't want this to be home, DALLAS is home.

But, this weekend I couldn't deny that in the 10 short months since I've been gone I have changed. I couldn't keep up this long distance thing anymore. We've only visited twice and how can a love affair really work if you don't see each other? So... we broke up. I have untied the ties that bind and let that ship sail. It's not fair to my new home,  it's not fair to my husband and kids and it's not fair to God that I kept looking back, or north really.

I still love Dallas, and of course it goes without saying that many of my dearest friends are there and will always be a part of our life. But I was running with a weight on my back. I had to get the weight and ache of missing that old life off so I can really grow here. Who knows what will happen! I believe good and exciting things are around every corner, we just have to have the eyes to see them.